Jan 5, 2020 | 5 comments

I’m throwing out my budget

Written by Jimmy McAfee

At the McAfee house, there is one New Year’s tradition that dwarfs all others. The new year ushers in budget season.

Kim and I put our first household budget together as soon as we got home from our honeymoon. It was 1992, and the world still ran on paper. We kept every receipt in our wallets until we stuck them on the refrigerator with a magnetic clip. When the pile got too big for the clip, one of us would pull down the pile and assign a spending category to each receipt. Then I would enter all the numbers into a spreadsheet on my giant, desktop computer, and we would have a family meeting on how things were going.

We didn’t have much money back then, and it took teamwork to make ends meet. Surprises were painful. The electric bill would occasionally come in way over our expectations, or we would discover that South Carolina had a very expensive wheel tax. Every dollar that was above the plan had to come out of another category.

It wasn’t just the bills though. We wanted to improve our condition. Kim longed for furniture that looked better than my grungy, college apartment had. I “needed” an ever-expanding list of power tools. We both wanted to run away to the beach for the weekend. Before any actions were taken, we had to make sure we would be able to balance the month.

We had a simple agreement. Once we settled on the budget, either of us could do whatever we wanted, as long as our actions fit within each spending category for that month. If something took more money than a particular category had available, we needed to sit down together and hammer out a plan first.

When we started, I naively thought that following a budget was about making sure to have enough money. In reality, it was much more important.

Kim and I had dreams that vastly exceeded our resources. As a starry-eyed young husband, I wanted to make all of her dreams come true. She felt the same way about me. We spent a lot of time listening to each other’s aspirations and tried to build financial plans to achieve them. I would never have overspent a category without discussing it with her first because it would have violated a trust.

It was years before I understood that budgeting was the foundation for good communication, building faith in each other, and fulfilling our dreams. The numbers and the money were just tools used to accomplish them.

For twenty-seven years, we have called them budgets, but they are actually recipes for turning our dreams into reality.
Until this year.
I’m not building a budget this year. It’s not that I don’t believe in them anymore, because I do. After a year that rocked everything, I don’t know what my dreams are. Having a budget without a dream is like following a recipe without knowing what it will make.
2019 was a year that changed everything. I lost my mom and grandmother. I gave my daughter in marriage to someone else. I watched James survive his own hardships like a man. A short-term health condition has become prolonged and changed what and how I do things. My role in the family is forever altered, and I don’t know how to deal with it yet.
In February of last year, I prophesied that a great storm would soon blow into my life (click to read “Riders on the Storm”). Now that it has come and gone, the job of rebuilding a new future stretches in front of me.

Humans are unique in all of creation. Instead of speaking us into existence, God took the time to form us with his hands into his own image and then breathe life into us out of his own lungs. He instructed us to rule over every living thing, to be fruitful and multiply.

God has given us his ability to imagine something and bring it into existence. He has given us the responsibility to use those gifts to expand his kingdom to cover the earth. It is territory that must be reclaimed with every new life that is born, and every person that grows into adulthood.

The violence of the storm has passed. My previous responsibilities are gone. I am left standing in an empty field with nothing but his words ringing in my ears – Be fruitful. Multiply. Expand my kingdom.

It is pointless to go blindly about the same tasks that the last season required. Nor is it time to act. First, it is time to dream.

I need to get in touch with the ambitions crafted into my heart. It is important for me to hang out with Kim while we lay on our backs staring at the shapes of the clouds that blow past. We will practice letting our imaginations run wild and remembering a time when anything was possible.

Like an artist staring at a blank canvas, the vision will burst from my heart. While I go about the business of imagination, my heart must be in harmony with God and his creation. The life areas that have guided budgets in the past will serve to keep me in balance. Born of a pure heart, dreams will come into focus.

Lord, grant me a very great dream of the future you have planned, then strengthen me to pursue it with all of my heart.
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Jimmy, what a powerful message you posted…Wow! Seasons of life turn as does the calendar, and God is in control each and every day. Will continue to pray for you and the family as God reveals what's next for you. To a large degree, we're in a similar place and looking for our next steps. God has never failed, looking forward to what He has planned.

So beautifully stated and set forth. Good job meeting this new season as well as setting the example and foundation for the previous. Your past will serve your future wonderfully well ❤

So much to say! You’re that the words from my heart and put them on paper. I learn from you, Jimmy

🙂 Love this!

Jimmy, I love this new blog format. I do not know why, but I am truly amazed at the beautiful way the may you string words together evoking, emotion, thought, inspiration and action. Your words are so motivating and a delight to read. I am still trying to figure out how you can “ bring it” each week with multiple compelling themes fact based on you and your family’s history, trials, learnings and Blessings. How are you able to retain so many ghost writers and direct theme as in conducting a beautiful symphony each week…it is a mystery. Awesome Brother,… Read more »

[…] January, I posted that I would not make a budget, and I haven’t (click here to read) Without a clear calling, I have waited for God to speak life into my year. He has spoken […]

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