Reset part 1: The Flood

I want a Reset for 2021 in a big way.

My fantasies of finding a happy path through the new year have already taken a beating. Before the first week of 2021 came to an end, we were faced with a single-day record of 291,000 COVID cases, a more contagious strain of the virus spreading across multiple states, a violent attack against democracy that was carried out by our own citizens, and national responses to the attack that further divided our country.

My heart is heavy.

It is hard to reconcile with my feelings from only a few days ago when I was fondly listening to “Auld Lang Syne” with high hopes for the unspoiled year that had limitless potential.

I’m already rethinking what I am hopeful for.

When Noah had finished building the ark, he and his family climbed the gangplank and boarded their traveling shelter. As it began to rain, they must have bowed in thanks to God for sparing them from the nightmare that was unfolding outside.

Their physical safety was guaranteed, but most of us are growing to understand the emotional toll of their next 375 days of lockdown. The atmosphere in the ark must have been heavy at times, both emotionally and spiritually. Their diets were limited. The scenery never changed. Managing sanitation and smell inside the floating barn would have been a dirty, full-time job.

Caged in a cell where the sun never shone, you can imagine their wishlist. Watching sports. Hearing the crunch of an apple when your teeth pierce its skin. Soaking in a hot bath until your fingertips wrinkle. Smelling honeysuckle while butterflies dance around the blooms. Feasting with the community after the harvest. Rocking slowly on the porch while the neighbors’ kids played games. Humming along while the band plays your favorite song.

But they would need new dreams when the ark’s door was opened. Floodwaters were washing away their previous lives and leaving behind uncertain. They needed ambitions better suited to their pending situation. Noah must have spent many nights speaking with the family about what the coming season would require. Each of them would have different responsibilities when they emerged into a world they had never known before.

As the floodwaters of our pandemic continue to rise, I am left to wonder what will be left behind when we open the ark’s door. The defining event of our generation is changing the landscape while we are locked away. A microscopic virus and unseen, supernatural forces are altering how we will interact with each other in ways that are both great and small.

Clear goals are difficult to set before the dawn of our release. I peer out the window and imagine how the world will be different. I have faith in a bright tomorrow but am still mourning a yesterday that is disappearing into the murky depths.

I have noodled and doodled, but most of my goals will only achieve a pleasant passing of the time. None of them represent the audacious daring of past years.

I have prayed for guidance and spent time searching the scriptures for answers. My hope arrived during a quiet morning devotional. It took the form of a warning that Jesus gave to the early church in Ephesus who was enduring its own torrent of change.

“But I have this against you, that you have abandoned the love you had at first. Remember then from what you have fallen; repent, and do the works you did at first. If not, I will come to you and remove your lampstand from its place”
Rev 2: 4-5

These verses could also be paraphrased to say that when we passionately embrace Jesus with the same excitement we had on the day of our salvation, He will remain with us and our lives will be blessed.

That is my theme for 2021.

To me, this is about more than attending church each week or reading the Bible in a year. It is more important than serving days or participating in a small group. In the verses before the quote above, Jesus thanked the church for their loyalty before giving them fair warning about their lack of passion.

“The love I had at first” was reckless, unbounded, heart-pounding excitement that consumed my thoughts. I remember the long walk up the church aisle. My head roared with the rush of a thousand voices singing in unison my promise to give Him my life. Everything else melted away, and He filled my eyes. No change seemed extreme, no request was insurmountable in my pursuit of Heaven itself.

The days that followed were a honeymoon of sorts. I was proudly baptized in front of my church. I read all the Gospel’s red-letter words to hear His voice. I was so excited that my name was written in His Book. My prayers were full of both the naiveté and passion of a spiritual child.

As time passed, did my excitement diminish? Did some of the shine wear off? Whether it did or not, I’m committing to maintaining the enthusiasm I had “at first”.

Passionately embracing means doing things just for him because I want to see his smile. It means writing a blog post that tells him I love him even if no one else pays attention. It means building a prayer garden to provide Him with a beautiful, quiet place to meet with people. It means standing ready to do anything else that would bring Him joy.

My objectives for the new year should be a list of ideas to bring us together. They should represent small reminders for me to get Jesus something great for his birthday, to celebrate our anniversary with more excitement than I had on that first day, and to tell everyone who will listen about my Savior.

Achieving my goals should increase the passion with which I pursue Jesus so that he will be more present in my life.

If my goals change, they will be replaced by something new that reflects the same motive – Embrace the love I had at first.

He is the great joy of my life.

Great and mighty things await on the horizon. For a time, floodwaters may rage and swirl tossing my life into unknown places. I know that He will bring me to rest on a mountaintop with a rainbow spanning the sky.

I will find the abundant life in 2021.