Making Waves just reached a major milestone – 10,000 times someone has clicked to read a post. I am so thankful for the time each of you shares with me. In recognition of this landmark moment, I’d like to take a few moments to reflect on the journey.
It’s been a little more than two years since October, 2017 when I self-published my book, Build Neighbors. A year had passed quickly as I focused on creative writing, enduring editorial criticism, designing graphics, and marketing for online sales. When the first copy arrived in the mail, I tore open the package like an excited kid at Christmas. It was everything I had hoped for, but suddenly it was finished.
At the same time, the First Fruits ministry came to an end. After seven years of coordinating workdays and meeting with troubled neighbors, God thanked me for serving well and released me from that role.
It didn’t take long to start asking “What’s next?”
In May, 2018, I mailed a letter to a friend that was titled “Redeemed” (click to see). While I was writing it and again when reading it afterward, God’s presence was tangible, like being wrapped in a warm blanket. I began to spend more time in a quiet corner of the living room, processing my thoughts and capturing them on my laptop.
I was hooked and Making Waves was born. Each of the past 67 posts has been part of my continuing effort to experience God in everyday life.
It began with blessings spoken over my family – my dad, brother, Erin and James. I have mourned the changing of seasons – the kids moving out in “Letting Go“, coping with my mom’s dementia in “My Mom’s Pictures” and her subsequent passing in “Living in the Moment“.
I searched to find a voice of joy in “We All Have a Psalm Inside“, and questioned greatness in “Granny’s Cookies“. When I grew weary of being labeled by the world, “The ADHD Test“, challenged whether our weaknesses were part of God’s design and our created purpose, only to turn around and question the pursuit of bigger things in “Make a Joyful Noise“.
I chronicled the family’s growth that came with my daughter’s wedding beginning with “My Blessing” and continuing for several other posts. I also begged my friends to stay with me in “Please, Don’t Hit That Button!” My family and my life are different than they were. I suspect yours are, too.
Through all of the changes that have come, a few constants have emerged. I’d like to share these with you, because they have grown beyond a blog into a greater part of how I try to live my daily life.
Here they are.
The blog can belong to God, or it can belong to me. It can’t be both.
Sixty-seven posts may have been published, but more than a hundred have been discarded. So many times, I sat down to begin writing and felt that the process was going nowhere. In those times, I have stopped and prayed for God to guide my thoughts before writing anything further. Eventually, he would put something on my heart and I would begin again.
When God’s favor rests on my work, a calmness comes with it. It can still be difficult, though. Wrestling with a specific truth can require hours of deliberation, but there is peace in the effort.
During the times that I want to write, but God takes issue with the timing, it can be frustrating. Summoning him on command as my captive muse does not work, and he reminds me that our relationship doesn’t work that way.
Then I have to decide if I would rather do things my way or do it with him at my side. Although it is difficult to release control and choose to wait, the rewarding time in his presence is my true goal.
Keep it real.
I began to realize how much of my own words I disagree with after I wrote them down and read over them. The platitudes made me shudder, knowing that nobody is comforted by them. They are shallow and insincere. My reality is more complex and it deserves better.
The difficult truth is that I have feelings that I know I shouldn’t have. I want to get better and the first step is admission. While I was writing “What If Jesus Couldn’t Read a Map?“, I had to face the truth that Jesus gets on my nerves occasionally. I’m certainly not proud of that, but until I faced it, I couldn’t get healthier.
Asking myself if I truly believe what I just said is a hard question and leads to confessions. I want a real relationship with Jesus, though, and honesty is the foundation.
Don’t exaggerate your weaknesses or minimize your strengths.
I reveal things about myself even at the expense of losing people’s respect. I want to be loved as God made me, not embraced because of a false image.
I have admitted that I make bad choices. I have shared immature emotional responses. I have acknowledged that I have limitations. But, I have tried to be as honest as possible about them.
Less than two months after starting Making Waves, God put it on my heart to tell How I Met Jesus. It was really hard. I’ve never been proud of that part of my past, and God asked me to make it one of my earliest posts published on Facebook. I learned that my fears were wrong. My story is His story and sharing it gave me freedom.
The fear of being mocked for my past is mild compared to that of being ridiculed for my ambitions. Even in my post, Candle in the Wind, I couldn’t reveal my secret wish. I wasn’t strong enough to imagine people quietly laughing at me, but I am trying to build my faith in who He says that I am.
We all face the same struggles. I hope that my honesty provides encouragement to other people who feel the same way.
Speak the hope of what will become, avoid dwelling on what is not.
When I am angry, I rage against the unfairness of life. I am hyper-critical of people’s actions and quick to point out what was wrong. However, I would rather be known for what I love. Criticism hasn’t brought me peace, but faith in the good things to come has, and it gives me a blueprint for my life.
The post “Breaking Free” was born out of a time when I was exasperated with a friend of mine. When I wanted to attack this person, I tried to back down and offer hope. I don’t know if my friend gained anything from the post or not, but I did. I learned to try and see a better day instead of complaining about a lesser one.
The past months have been wonderful. God gave me a gift in Making Waves and I hope it helps me to become a better man. I hope it helps you, too. Whatever life holds for us, I look forward to sharing it with you.
It’s already been a week since we had a great Thanksgiving. Erin put together a vegetarian spread that was awesome, and we chose to supplement it with a melt-in-your-mouth brisket and skipped the turkey altogether. The five of us had a great meal, a good time, and naps abounded afterward.
Kim handed out cards for us to write down things we were thankful for. We passed them around like gifts and read them out loud. The newlyweds were thankful for each other, as they should be. Kim shared the usual mom stuff. James and I were kind of all over the board with our lists. We are all truly blessed, and it is easy to feel that way on a special day like that.
Thankfulness lies at the heart of Christianity. Accepting God’s grace creates an attitude of thankfulness that follows you throughout your day. Every morning, I try to start out my prayer with a moment of thanksgiving to start my day off right.
However, on some days I just can’t find it in me to be thankful.
In general, I am a morning guy. I don’t hit “snooze” and hope for an extra ten minutes. I like to get out of bed and enjoy a hot cup of coffee while contemplating the great things the day will hold. Being thankful should come automatically.
But many times it doesn’t. As I stare at the bottom of my coffee cup, my heart can feel just as empty. Kim has patiently endured countless tirades while I prepare for work. The potential causes are endless. The kids are on my nerves. Work assignments landed on my desk that shouldn’t have. I feel sick or sore. Friends act in ways that continue to invite trouble.
Listening to myself, I know how my tantrums sound. In defiance of a remarkably blessed life, complaints erupt like a geyser. I pout like a spoiled child. Indulging these feelings doesn’t make them go away, but neither does ignoring them.
A couple of mornings ago, I was on a roll. The more I complained, the longer my list of grievances became. With each item that added to the list, the angrier I got. As I walked out the door to go to work, I was a mess.
Some days, I listen to praise music and my frustrations are drowned out. Not this time. I felt like Eeyore with a rain cloud hovering over me. So much was unfair and it demanded a response.
Then I remembered a passage from my devotional that morning.
For we do not have a high priest who is unable to empathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet he did not sin. Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.(Hebrews 4:15-16)
Jesus doesn’t tell us to ignore our problems and put on a coat of sunshine. He’s been there himself and knows how hard it can be. He wasn’t always the King of Kings, after all. There was a time when he was a carpenter, an older brother, and a regular guy.
I imagine him leaving for work on a Wednesday morning when it was still dark outside, knowing that he would spend the entire day rebuilding a table because someone changed their mind. He knew that he would be coming home late from a job he shouldn’t have to be doing after listening to constant whining about how he was disrupting someone’s precious routine.
Jesus woke up on cold mornings with a headache and a low-grade fever. As he got dressed, he couldn’t find the sandals his brothers had borrowed without asking. He hurried off to work anyway because he was the oldest son and had a family that depended on his income.
Jesus got splinters and smashed his thumb. At times, his family didn’t believe in him. His friends betrayed him. His neighbors laughed at him. He had a hard, troubled life.
So when I scream out in frustration, he understands because he’s lived through it all. He sits with me patiently while I vent and holler. When I am done, he walks with me to the throne of God and asks for mercy on my behalf.
Some people may think that having God’s son in my corner asking for my special treatment would make me selfish. After all, if he will go with me to God’s throne, why not ask for every comfort in life?
But it doesn’t work that way. The time I spend with an understanding savior who has already given his best for me calms my angry spirit. It makes me realize everything he has already done for me.
On the mornings that I wake up and my heart is empty, it’s OK to be angry. It’s OK to complain about unfair treatment. Instead of burdening my wife with my complaints, though, I should share them with the Prince of Peace. When I’m finished, he will walk with me to the throne of God’s grace.
