Some mornings I wake up to a day that seems to have a shadow cast over it. They are nothing and nobody days. Nothing seems to make me happy and nobody seems to do things the right way.
The cause may be that I am feeling bad, the world is wearing on me, or spiritual forces are attacking me. Whatever the cause, the outcome is the same. People just seem to get on my nerves. All kinds of people for all kinds of reasons. They are rocks in my path.
They are everywhere – inattentive waitresses, preachy vegans, disconnected politicians, robo-callers, always-late doctors, backseat drivers, reply-to-all email senders, noisy neighbors, emoji talkers, channel surfers, no-show contractors, whiners, so-superior Facebookers, armrest hoggers, line cutters, constant “uhm” sayers, loud chewers, rude customer servicers, slow walkers, door-to-door window sellers, and trash-can missers.
I am quick to judge that my frustrations are their fault. My ground rule is simple in deciding what is “fair” or “reasonable”. I even have a name for it.
WWID – What Would I Do. If I were them, what would I have done? Expect the same thing from others as you expect from yourself. One standard that applies to everyone equally.
If you cut into line, you shouldn’t have. WWID? Wait your turn.
If you no-show a commitment, that is wrong. WWID? Do what you say you will do.
If you robo-call me, that is annoying and even illegal. WWID? Be respectful and follow the law.
Judging is very efficient when I hold people accountable to what I think of myself, but it doesn’t seem to bring me joy. It is also unfair.
I am judging other people based on an opinion of my own capabilities, circumstances, values, and preferences. In reality, nobody shares all of these things with me. God made me as a unique creature with unique capabilities and placed me into a unique environment. How could someone else be me?
In order to climb up this emotional ladder, I need to remember how I descended in the first place.
On my happy days, I follow the Golden Rule that Jesus gave us in Matthew 7:12.
Focusing on what Jesus has already done for me gives me the strength to do things for others. When I take my eyes off him and focus on the tasks, the Golden Rule becomes exhausting. I get tired of running around trying to do so much and just like Peter started to sink when he took his eyes of Jesus, I slide down my own ladder.
When I get tired of working too hard, I step down a few rungs to the Even Steven Rule.
The workload is much lighter here. I get to ignore all the people who don’t appreciate me and focus my efforts on people who return the favor.
This fails when people have their own problems. Eventually, they become too needy or offend me. When that happens, I slide down further and the WWID Rule goes into effect.
The word “do” is totally removed from the WWID Rule. Instead of doing anything, I just sit back and expect better. On these days, I have totally forgotten everything I have received and look past the constant blessing in my life. I stop receiving from Jesus and start expecting from others. That is when the list of people who frustrate me starts to grow.
If you have WWID days like me, the good news is that Jesus is more than enough. Whatever we expect of him, he continues to exceed. When we reach for him, we begin to climb back up the ladder.
As we climb back past the Even Steven level, we see that he has done more for us than we can do for him. The closer we look, the more blessings we see that are piled up. Golden Rule days are easy when you focus on receiving and releasing blessings that overwhelm your ability to hold them all.
The Golden Rule was based on the law of the Old Testament. The New Testament version of the Golden Rule isn’t a rule at all. It is a Life of Grace and it is the highest rung on the ladder.
Grace doesn’t require us to “do” or “give” anything. It doesn’t turn on or off based on our response. Grace gives us the chance to share with other people who Jesus loves just as much as he loves us.
In this world, I expect that WWID days will happen. When they do, the important thing is for me to quit expecting to receive more from others and start focusing on what to do with the overflow I already have.
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Jimmy, thank you for the transparency. Some days I suffer the same Malody